Sitting in the Chevy Feeling Kind of Heavy

That.... is the picture I was taking of Rowan. He was reaching for my camera. So those of you that know me IRL and wonder why there are never any new photos.... that is why. He also thinks my phone is the best toy.

Anyway it seems that blogging has taken a wayside of my life- as it usually does. Seems it comes in waves and typically only during the tsunami- like ones. The waves of life that want to take over until I'm about to burst.

I would like to blog a few times a week, but I always sit down, open it, and nothing comes out. I guess I need drama in my life for word vomit. Of course those also make the best blogs. That and when I get my ah-ha moments. You know the ones, when life throws something so profound it changes your perspective.

Kind of like the sermon I heard a few weeks ago. What comes out of your mouth is a window to what your heart is. I have been acutely aware of all the negative things that pour out when I speak. The selfishness inside me, too. Very thought provoking. I want my heart as pure and white as snow. So I have to change the way I think.

Like it used to be when people cut me off when I'm driving I'd tell myself that maybe they have diarrhea. I know- ridiculous, but it helped put my grumbling in perspective because maybe they DID have diarrhea and I've had diarrhea while driving and it's NO fun wondering if you're going to burst in your seat or not.

Recently I kind of stopped with that excuse and started my growling in my throat again. There is a lot going on with me as I drive- such as the construction on my road slows me to a halt. Wouldn't be terrible, but I'm pouring sweat because the a/c in my car is broken. Most of the time that is remedied by rolling down the window, but I can't because my window doesn't go down. So the air-flow from the passenger side is the only air I get in this high degree heat advisory weather. The hotter I get the wetter I get, the more my hair frizzes, etc., etc. I start to feel like Dr. Horrible's "evil moisture buddy" Moist. The most badass I can get is making people feel like they need a shower... and usually it's me in the end that needs a good rinse off.

So anyway I guess I need to put things back into perspective to clear the conscious of my heart. I need to go back to thinking the drivers may have diarrhea. Nothing wore that sitting in construction feeling kind of heavy. I'm sure that would be even worse than bringing a dish towel to wipe the sweat as you sit patiently as another jerkface butts in front of you.

VOTE

I know this isn't a typical blog.... but please vote for Rowan! I think it would be really awesome if he won.

Rowan

Wedding Bellz

So... if you have a family member, like say an uncle that recently got married, and he invites most of the family and you're on the side that did NOT get an invitation what would you do? I'm not estranged to this family member. I mean we're not the closest, but I thought the last couple years we have been building a good relationship. We don't have any unusual animosity that would be cause for concern in the family (that I know of).

Okay I shouldn't have been surprised not to get invited because when I originally asked about the dates and if we would need to make arrangements to get time off of work or whatever my question was pretty much avoided.

He told me it was going to be very small. It wasn't until I started hearing from certain family members they got invitations and did I get mine? Um no. So I waited a couple of weeks before asking other members. I'm not the only family member to be left out. There was one sister invited, but not the other 2. 1 didn't really care. She said "it's his wedding and he can have it whatever way he wants on his day." Good point. So I have been trying really hard to keep that perspective. Obviously I'm failing because my feelings are hurt anyway. The other sister also had hurt feelings.

So to make things worse (I have a knack for that) I confided in one of my aunts and she must have said something to him because he emailed me an invitation, BUT in an attempt to keep up with what I perceive as my uncle's wishes I declined. I don't want to invite myself to something I'm not invited to. That is rude and obviously I wasn't wanted to begin with. He told me he thought I had my children and couldn't make the trip and that is why my invitation was an over site. As for the other cousin who had hurt feelings- he didn't know her address. We are all on facebook together so I know there could easily have been some communications to avoid these hurt feelings.

I'm trying to keep my oldest cousin's advice, but I planned a wedding once. I know how hectic that can be. Maybe it's because of my previous planning experience that I don't exactly buy these excuses. It's the principle. I don't think you should invite one sister and not the other. Or certain family members in the same vicinity and not all.

I've been told the wedding was very small and no big deal, but why invite part of the family and not all of the family? There is a reason I'm not as close to some family members as the cousin that DID get invited. Because I'm never there. I can't even have an opportunity to remedy the situation. I WANT to be closer to my family. After all, blood is thicker than water, right? I would like to see my other family (his son and fiance- I never even met her and they've been together for YEARS). I talk to my uncle A LOT on facebook so I'm no stranger and I'm having trouble getting past my hurt feelings.

Roofing In The Rain

Today was Gwyneth's 3rd grade special thingie at her school. Gavin's was last week. I love how they are both so talented and that we get to do special things like that. Even if I am sitting for 2 hours on a rock hard bench so I can hear Gavin play for 5 minutes or that the lady in the purple shirt moved every time I did blocking my view of Gwyneth. Yeah... lady- Rowan is going practicing how to throw stuff. See how long she sits in front of me again. Oh I would never do that!! would I?

I think it is so neat seeing the young lady that my daughter is turning into. I'm so glad I can be a part of my children's lives. I keep thinking I should do something special for Josh to make him feel special.... but what? I thought about looking up an origami thingie and making him something. I think he would like that.

So we've been getting our roof done for about a week and a half now. I thought the job was only to take a couple of days... When it went on 3 days I thought they would be finishing up... but no. Apparently they don't work Saturdays, either. SOOOO this week it has been rainy, rainy, rainy. and guess what happens to roofs that are half way done when it rains a lot? I think we may be getting a little bit of new insulation, some dry wall, and a few ceilings re-painted. The big bossman came yesterday. He wasn't a very happy camper with our house, but with the storms (it was like hail and tornado siren storms all day) it is a little understandable something like this might have happened. I'm just upset they quoted us "a couple of days" because if it had been done in a "couple of days" then this wouldn't have happened!

So I asked the foreman (or one of the bossmen) about why it was taking so long. They had 3 mostly non-rainy days last week and Saturday was spectacular (well I was sick in the bathroom all day, but from what I hear it was perfect roofing weather- and perfect enjoy your life weather if you're not sick), but they don't work Saturdays, probably because it was going to be the end of the world.

He told me it was his fault. His men started our house before they were finished with another and the other one took a little longer to finish than they anticipated. He also said that he had some medical appointments so he wasn't exactly around to do a lot of the work right away... So basically the job was started before he was ready. I told him I understood the rain had been delaying a lot of projects like this (it has been incredibly wet this season) and we wouldn't have minded delaying another week. But anyway what is done is done and now we just need to move forward and finish the job.

Is it weird that I feel bad for them though? I mean they ARE going to take care of us, but there were several neighbors asking about them, but with this mess and taking so long (despite the rain) I hope it doesn't mess up their reputation. I think the guys really are working hard... just need to be on top of things. Now that the big bosses are out I'm sure it'll get finished lickity-split, I just feel bad because our house is like their lemon.

Anyway that is my rant for now and the lesson I have learned is I'm glad I'm not a roofer.

The Dust Has Settled

Okay I know it's been a while since you all got to be enthralled by my wonderful blogging and the blogginess it brings to your life. Well things have been slow and busy at the same time! I recall starting some projects before I had my daughter and they got left by the way side once she was born. Amazing how those things just take up your entire life. So there it is, another baby sucking any time I have and leaving me exhausted by ends day. Oh and I'm sure the kids I have been babysitting don't leave me deprived of energy either.

So I had a birthday this weekend. I officially moved up an age bracket. I think that may be part of the whole "energy" problem. My bones aren't creaking though so that is good. Except frankenankle, but he hardly counts.

I was so sick this weekend and had NO energy. Yuck. Kirby is the best husband ever! He planned to take me to a day spa and then dinner with my girlfriends. Normally I might have cried out of guilt for being sick, but I was too sick to even do that. What a sweetheart I snagged, tho! He went out of his way tonight to get me some chicken noodle soup. Because an upset stomach with tomato soup or french onion soup (my choices) I don't think would do. I'm feeling loads better tho! Just some headaches from not eating... which apparently my head didn't talk to the stomach to find out why nothing was going IN so it is being very unsympathetic to my situation. It should be happier since I gobbled that soup. Which by the way- I think was the tastiest chicken noodle soup I have ever eaten in my entire life!!!

Okay and for those of you that only follow me for the Rowan... He is pulling himself up! I'm amazed at how fast he has grown and I wish he would slow down. Just last year I was plump with baby and now I'm 15lbs short of my pre-pregnancy weight (which that can come a BIT faster if it wants- but no more stomach ailments!) and it amazes me how fast a year really does go by!

This year I will be an official mom of a teenager and I'm not ready. I wish I could go tuck Gavin in like I do his sister. I kinda like seeing him grow up, but I miss him being little, too!