Sunday, October 25, 2009

One Flaw In Women

I got this in an email. I don't know who the author is, but I thought it was pretty good. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month so recognizing the women seems appropriate. Cuz we all know even sick we still carry on.

One Flaw In Women

Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens,
but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.

They don't take "no" for an answer
when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel
and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about
a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member,
yet they are strong when they
think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss
can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you
to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what
makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their
family and friends.

Women have vital things to say
and everything to give.


Monday, October 19, 2009

Things I do sometimes.

So I have like this giant zit on my nose. It was like the exaggerated ones they do in movies and t.v. Only for real. Bright red and hurty. I hate the hurty ones. So I made sure to have make up on today and to take some cover up with me. I was in the ladies room "touching" up. I felt like such a priss. No one cared nor does anyone care. But I do and that is the law of zits.

Also I was driving home and it is one of those roads where you drive down and if you don't move over next thing you know is you're in a turn lane. Traffic was thick (and there were 2 motorcycles behind me) and I turned into a lane. Turns out I should have stayed in the one I was in because that was the turning lane. I could have moved over right away, except I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of the motorcycles. So essentially I wasted 5 minutes and had to go on the interstate because I was an idiot too embarrassed to move back over. Oh well better to save face than look silly around strangers.

I don't know what my mood is today. Making up for not being silly for the last several weeks I guess.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Last Place I Looked...

Why is it when you are looking for something it's always in the last place you looked? Seriously. Grr. I lost some important documents and my orientation is tomorrow. So if you do the math that means I have to find them (yeah sometimes I'm a procrastinator, but I knew I'd have a good part of the day to accomplish this task).

I was thinking about it before I went to sleep last night because they have been missing for several months. I've been meaning to go to the proper offices and get new copies, and well frankly, that's a pain in the arse. So I never got around to doing that.

In my sleep I was looking for these documents in the usual places I have the last few months. Then I looked in my glove box and there they were! So you would think that would be the first place I looked, right? Um. No. I don't exactly work that way.

I seriously looked for like 5 hours. I was so aggravated. I looked on top of the fridge in those empty cabinets, in the closet where we keep the cat snacks, and in last years coat pockets. Behind my dresser (even though I already looked there last month) as well as the giant bag of documents to be shredded. I tore the cushions off of the couch, looked in between books (maybe I used the envelope for a bookmark and forgot)- you name it in the house and I looked. It didn't matter how ridiculous.

I told Kirby if he is ever missing any special documents or papers, if they're not in my filing cabinet we don't have them.

BUT on a whim I remembered my dream so I dug everything out of my glove box and there they were!! Holy freaking cow pies! What a wast of my entire day! I should have followed my subconscious and checked out my car in the first place. There was even a business card from the last place I visited in the envelope. Why did I put them there? In my car of all places?

I'll tell you why. I knew I'd need them and didn't want to file them or carry them around- so me being me put them in a place where I wouldn't forget. Those stupid papers have been missing for months and months! I hate it when I do that! Except when I hide money and forget. I found $20 the other day in my planner. Cool.

Lesson: In this case persistence paid off. It also got 2 closets organized.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


Pretty sure someone used my email to sign up for some stuff or something. I keep getting spam for my email in a nick name that only a few people know about. Hmm wonder who it could be? Most of it are for pretty good deals.

In my OCD I have to check my spam mail before I delete it. I don't know why- maybe I'll miss something?

I remember when I was 16 my cousin and a friend prank called all these businesses posing as me, giving them my name and address, and saying how much I loved their product (or whatever it was). I got stuff in the mail for weeks. They were so jealous because they thought I was going to get in trouble (out of love, of course).

I still have the "bit-o-honey" towel. Or whatever it is. One of those candies you only see around Halloween. Oh gosh- I love the sweet factory!

Monday, October 12, 2009


Things on my end are starting to take a happier note, as I look forward to starting my new job! I'm so excited. Still not thrilled about the hours, but I'm sure as time will have it I'll have an opportunity to get what I need. I just hope it's sooner than later. Trying to think positive here.

Either way I got new glasses after 2 months of broken ones!

So what antics can I get myself into now? I suppose the antic of sticking my nose where it doesn't belong (I am of the female species). I have been thinking about a status one of my facebook friends had posted. It was about a parent, and basically they were very upset. I get that. We all get upset with our parents from time to time, especially when we don't understand as much as we should.

It was just one status, one simple post written out of aggravation for some situation. Whatever the deal- it kind of saddens me to think that a parent and their child aren't communicating. So I know what it's like to have someone not around when you want them to be. Sadly, I've had those experiences. I just hate to see someone push their child or their parent away because of whatever stresses are going on in their life.

It is so much easier to let our human side allow us to be mad, hold grudges, and be upset because of some perceived wrongs against us. It is easier to dislike than to love. Humans feed off of negativity (look at the media). I know all this because I've been there.

I wish there was some wise words I could say or something I could do. Even as adults children still crave for their parents approval and love. I don't want to think of a relationship being destroyed or hurt when all they need to do is get together and work our their differences. To be heard for your transgressions and to have an opportunity to teach your children the gift of compromise, agreeing to disagree, or to find a resolution together. Teach them to listen with an open mind and be honest with each other (they will take it with them all their lives).

I understand that changes and stress happen. I know that some things will never be "like they were," but one must adapt to change. Learn to forgive; make an attempt to love when it feels too difficult. Don't shut someone out, don't choose sides, be open and be better than the anger you feel.

Yeah- a lot easier said than done. I know that, too. Ugh, for experiences! All in all though, I think it has made me a better person to learn from my mistakes. My wish for my friends is that they learn and grow, too.

Thursday, October 8, 2009


I forgot to mention the funny part. Remember when I said I totally screwed up?

I couldn't find the door to the building (it was apparently blocked by trucks). Since I wasn't sure if it was the job for me, I left. I got a call half an hour later and I was so rude to the poor girl. I told her I was there, but couldn't find the door to get in. She said she wasn't sure if she could reschedule me because they set that time aside specifically for me. I told her to "do what you gotta do" so she said she would talk to her supervisor. Obviously they rescheduled me (and described where the door was). So I could go back.

Oh and the truck thing gets even better. I think only me could do this too- because I backed into one of the truck's plastic barrels as I was backing out to leave. It was in my blind spot. Good think it was plastic and no harm done!

How goosey is that? And I think only I would ever use the "I can't find the door" excuse and actually mean it. Actually I've never heard of anyone using that excuse.

Thank you, Carrie (from a Whole Lotta Bull)


My reply to your comment was too long, so I guess it's a new blog.

You're right. Normally I'd like to think of myself as a positive thinker, too. I've just been so discouraged lately that only negatives are filling my head (and 2 negatives make a positive, right?). I know I'm acting selfish and being negative and should be excited. I think deep down I am.

This new job is exactly the same as the other one- just a different company. It is only the hours that upset me. 2nd shift- I won't see my children or family as much. When I finished college I swore I would never do anything that took family time away because I missed SO much (I think that deep down is what breaks my heart). But I've done it before and can do it again. And just because it's 2nd's now doesn't mean I'll be working that for the rest of my life.

I know that, so I shouldn't be so silly about it.

Also, I've been known to word vomit my feelings in my blog- and that is what I did. Honestly, I DO feel better getting it all out.

I worked for that company before, I think it is just one person that has a problem with me. I know that no matter where you go or what you do there will always be someone that we rub each other the wrong way. So I know now (from my previous mistakes) that for the sake of the team and company that I just have to bite my tongue and agree to disagree. Like one of my other friends said- "stupid terds don't realize what/who they are letting slip through their fingers." She always has a way with words that cheers me up.

I'm sure once I get back to feeling better, and new glasses- now that I have a job I can get new glasses!! *Mine have been snapped and glued together 3 times for 2 months now.* Yay! I can afford new glasses. See? I'm feeling snappier already.

Thanks for your comment.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Kick em while they're down!

So I haven't really updated on what's going on with the whole "blowing steam" blog. Well here's the deal. I waited over a month for one company for a position I would be great in and they finally told me that they decided to cancel the position. Okay, fine. I kind of figured they didn't want me (even though they said they did). There was someplace even better I had my eye on.

I really, really wanted to get in at another company. I am familiar with the company, love the people, the products, I have over 2 years experience in the particular area they were hiring for. I was even willing to take a 'pay cut' I wanted it so bad. But lo and behold, after waiting for several weeks (a ridiculous amount of time to wait for an answer, might I add), they found that I was not a fit for the company. As instant messengers and texters say: WTF?

Apparently, even though I knew everyone I interviewed with (with exception of one) and even though I liked everyone I would potentially be working with, (a couple of whom I had worked with before) AND even though everything I was told about the job was exactly what I had done previously... Even though I could grow into an even better person in my field and fine tune my skills (as I feel I have superb experienced in). Even though it was a perfect fit for me and the OWNERS stopped to say hello to me and ask me how I was doing, etc. -I am apparently not a good fit.

So, yes, I was horribly shocked and disappointed, as were some of the people that work there that thought it was the perfect job for me. I thought for sure I had the job and I was told that they were really considering me...

So I did what all mature adults do: I cried. I had to put on make up so the kids didn't know I had been crying. How pathetic is that?

I was just starting to feel better about the whole crappy rejection thing (at least I didn't cry anymore) when I get my rejection letter in the mail. Why in the world would they send me a letter when I already knew they didn't want me? So I can add it to my collection? To kick me while I was down? To put salt in the wounds?

So the letter said "While they were most impressed with my qualifications, blah, blah, blah. My qualifications were not a good fit for the position." Okay it didn't actually have blah, blah, blah I just don't want to bore you with typical details.

Now help me understand this: if my qualifications aren't good for the position, please tell me what in this green earth do they need? I doubt many can match my qualifications or experience in that area. How can I not have good qualifications when everything you said the job required I have done in that position and I could do and more?

At any rate, I interviewed with another company -I totally screwed up- and I had a migraine today during my other 2 interviews- they offered me a job? What do you know- it's mostly the same as this other one (only more in depth). Hmm? I'm not good enough for my #1 choice where I know the products, processes, and how to work the customer- but I'm good enough to start cold at some company I practically blew off? How messed up is that?

Oh and by the way, this company will tell you pretty quickly if they want you or not.

I realize that I could have easily stayed where I was, and I'd be fine there making more than what the companies rejecting me are starting out... I liked it there, but I was selfish and wanted something different. I wanted to put my skills to use. Of course I left for several reasons, my migraines primarily being it, but I'm starting to get those under control. Should I go back and beg for my old position? I don't want to, I just want companies to see my worth for what it really is and give me a chance.

Thank you new company for giving me the offer and I'm sorry you weren't my favorite choice to start with.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Blowing Steam

I'm going to be very frank here. I'm tired of waiting. I'm tired of being told to wait some more and I'm tired of being rejected. This whole situation just sucks.

There I got it out. I'm trying to be positive, but it is getting very hard to do.

Anyway today is a blah day and I wish I hadn't even of crawled out of bed. Except for a little trick I played on Kirby it has been dull and uneventful. I hope he was a good sport about it. I was thinking that it was inappropriate, but funny at the same time because it's so outrageous.

Phil and Heather came over to say hi as they were on my side of town because they both had half days or something. Of course they didn't call so I hear a knock on the door. Well I'm not answering it if I don't know who you are so he had to eventually remove his finger off of the peep hole. I kept thinking it was Roger the evil insurance guy.

I'm blaming the negative portion of my life situation on him. He's a good enough scapegoat, although he doesn't look very goat-y in real life. Yeah why should I take blame for the choices I made in my life? Yes, the decisions I made were my decisions to make, but society doesn't think you should accept the consequences as yours. So therefore I won't accept my decisions as my mistakes... I'm kidding; I just wanted to be a jerk. But rereading this I am a really wimpy jerk. I have the super power of migraine attack, so be aware!! Okay I don't have that either.

I always say that you need the downs to help you appreciate the ups, but I don't know if I'm ever going to appreciate it again. Because I'm mad at my ups right now for being so good to me.

Anyway I was just blowing off some steam. This was a really sucky day. I was rejected for something I really wanted and I don't know why. What I wanted was the perfect fit for me, and me for them. Of course that is my opinion and obviously someone else doesn't share it.

I need to get some mental powers of persuasion. I think that would help me get what I want.

Lesson: I'm pretty sure I've said this before, but if you fall off the horse you must get back on. Even if the horse steps on your spine and breaks it while you're still on the ground.